"Change of Plans"
So if you're reading this, first of all thank you for stopping by! Secondly, I am very excited to be sharing my first solo project with you all, "Change of Plans." I wanted to share a bit about how this project came to be and why I am so humbled and grateful for the excitement and support I have garnered.
My journey with music has been a long road, one that is still in essence just beginning! I have always wanted to embark out on my own and pursue a musical career but was honestly very afraid to take the leap. I think I can speak for most of us when I say that for a long time I was sucked into the proverbial, "this is what I should be doing" monotony. I say this with the caveat that there is nothing wrong with a 9 to 5; I just knew that for me I felt like a fish out of water.
I felt that if I had a 9 to 5, a steady relationship, etc. that I was "on track". It was so confusing to feel like a puzzle piece that simply did not fit anywhere. I have always been a hard worker and could not understand why I felt I was not getting to the "promised land". Everything I tried seemed like "the right thing" at the time. I am the type of person that has a very hard time fully devoting myself to something that my heart is not in. I have no grey area; I'm either all the way in or all the way out. Shortly after conception of these situations, the tiny voice in the back of mind screamed that this was not for me. And I had to regroup.
It was an extremely frustrating cycle to be in, to feel as if I was simply wandering aimlessly. Music was always calling to me, everyone would always ask me about it and I always put it away in my mind; though I knew deep down it made me happier than anything else. The only reason I put it away was because I was afraid. Yes afraid. It's a hard thing for me to admit; I'm extremely prideful and don't like to give up on anything or show weakness if I can help it. Still I feel sharing these hardships in my life is important, because we all face obstacles and speaking about them brings us closer together. I came to the realization that there is no virtue in chasing things that are not for me. I was afraid of the risk, what my family would think, that music is not a "practical job", and I grappled with that up until last year.
Then everything changed. My relationship ended, a relationship that I thought was leading to marriage. My best friend of 10+ years and I parted ways. I hated my job to the point of tears. I was pushed all the way out of my comfort zone. I was out on an emotional limb and the only thing that stayed constant through it all was music and the people that believed in me and had my back no matter what. When I would lay down at night and pray to God to give me answers as to my future, the very next day someone would contact me for a feature or ask me if I was still singing. I knew I was fighting my calling, but I was still afraid.
Then one day I literally felt like I could have jumped out of my skin. I felt I had outgrown my life. Everything had to be shed; it just was not fitting anymore. I was in school, studying towards clinical psychology and I decided I was not going back. I called my friend and said, "let's get to work." And by work I meant music.
There have been ups and downs, moments of uncertainty, financial struggles, relationship drama, home drama... you name it... it's happened. But music has always been unwavering through it all. No matter what I've dealt with, music was there to soothe, uplift, heal, help and guide me.
So I continue to push onward. I let go of everything I was holding onto; convincing myself I needed. Whatever obstacle came my way I simply fought through because my love of music is so strong it simply did not matter. I knew that God had my back and if I did my part, He wouldn't let me fail. And through that faith I am doing what I absolutely love.
I call this intro project "Change of Plans" and coupled it with the Lebron James photo to demonstrate the twists and turns life can throw our way. Lebron was traded to the Cavaliers and everyone had an opinion. Everyone will always have opinions. At the end of the day you have to know yourself, your heart, your journey and push forward. One must rise above opposition and triumph in the knowing that you are on the path you were meant for. With that faith, failure simply isn't an option.
I am so humbled to be able to share the beginning of something that means so much to me. The joy I feel when I create a song is the same joy I pray each person feels when they hear it. That cycle of positivity is everything to me and to be able to do that for the rest of my life is just about the best thing that I could possibly imagine. To all my friends, family and acquaintances that have supported me to through this journey; I whole-heartedly thank you! I can't wait to share my music with you all!